.: pamper :.
Standing alone my senses reeled
... sensory deprivation is an intersting phenomenon, as is social isolation. When it is voluntary, doubly so. Time to take stock, reflect on all that is, was, and could be - I wonder how many take that time? I wonder if it would make a difference if we did? I wonder if there is power in the process of putting into words the things that we experience? I wonder...
A fatal attraction holding me fast, how can I escape this irresistible grasp?
...sooo, I went on another Kairos retreaty thing, and am reminded of why i keep fronting up for them, as they can deal with some important shizz. Altho sworn to secrecy, I thinks that when a young adult takes time to dig around in their life, reflect on what they find and gain a broader insight into what is out there, it can be a powerful thing. I am also reminded of the power of love in our lives, and the effect that out love ones can have on us. I am also conscious that there are no absolutes, no "one size fits all" template that makes a complete and happy life, but by jingo it is interesting looking for that "holy grail".
A big thank you goes out to all those who know they deserve it - such lovely chaps; and heart-felt thanks to others that shared the journey ... nuff said.
Cant keep my eyes from the circling skies
...now I remembered seeing a pole fixed into the ground - a real tall bugger, and squinting into the light I could see at the top a small platform barely 2ft long and 1ft wide. A ladder was propped on the pole and barely came up 1/3 of the way - plastic indoor rock-clmbing rock as as handles zig-zagged the remaining distance to the top. I hatched a plan. It was geeky, but it was a plan... you see, I figured if I ask my players to work their way up to the pamper pole and take a leap of faith in the _virtual_ world, then I should be up for doing it in the _real_ world.
...now I know that does not seem well thought out, and in truth it was not, and in retrospect I am glad I did not analyse it too much. We went over to the high ropes course, others [admittedly a fraction of my age and many times more agile] managed it so I wazgunna have a go. I stepped into a body harness [thanking the designer for removing the worry that I would ever have any more kids ... does it need to be that tight? ...apparently it does] and began the ascent. Now, i should point out at this point that I am actually a little terrified of heights, and I know gravity and I have this "special" relationship, but again, thinking this thru too thoroughly would have resulted in it not happening, so I decided to concentrate on each step - and looking for a safe way to make the next one from where I was. I have no idea of time elapsed, but I eventually found myself with a delemma - the pole ran out and I had to get onto a tiny platform - vertical to horizontal. At first I hoiked one knee up, then found the other leg had turned to jelly and did not want to move. After heaving and heaving and heaving finally I was kneeling on the platform and there was no spare space - the heaving had begin the pole swaying back and forth .... and then I looked down.
...now I am an accomplished panicker, but resisted the urge to run away because it was _not possible_ and returned to the urgent matter of how to stand up - a brainwave saw me hoik my weak leg up to squat, then find that the weak leg didnt have enough oomf left to help me get the other leg up. After a mo, I somehow managed it [along with a litany of really bad language I think - sorry to anyone who was in earshot - I was concentrating on other things at that stage] and there was me, atop a pole, squatting and gripping the platform for grim death as it swayed violently ... calm, calm, and it slowed and stopped, then without thinking about it, I stood, shuffled towards the leading edge to look at my target - a trapese bar a meter or so away. To get there, you have to take a leap of faith - I guess you have to believe you can get there, or just to have a go - I did and I did.
Leg and Bum muscles are now reminding me of my arrangement with gravity but there is a certain satisfaction in not plummeting to my death or worse - hanging awkwardly on the end of a rope embarassed at being unable to achieve a goal ... life lesson anyone? [soo pleased for you Josh ftw!]
Tongue-tied and twisted just an earth-bound misfit, I
A big helloooooooo to those nice chappies in Pink Floyd, some lyrics from "Learning to Fly" - when the talent was handed out, these guys got in the queue many times.
pedwipe (v.) The action of cleaning liquid off the floor with a sock that is still on ones foot because one has run out of paper towels, is to lazy to go get something else to clean it up, or is to lazy to lean over and clean it properly. Invariably it is followed by forgetting you have done this before plunging your foot into your previously clean sneakers, forever cursing them with odours of sour milk and red cordial.
previous blargs - :time: :blue: :new: :annus horribilis: :hair: :vegicide: :i love lamp: :show: :life on mars: :plumbing the depths: :zoupa: :traces of nut: :freak of the week: :TV or not TV: :screwed: :pre-op: :what a nerve: :five yards: :gone: :one: :three: :four: :techno-logic: :ergo is not a dirty word: :15 mins: :online: :dust, anyone?: :notwerk: :sprung: :drive, she said...: :kidney: :iRate: :monitor: :alliance: :pamper: :allies: :heroes: :area: :appraisal: :barnstorming: :renegade: :where there is smoke...: :noob year: :dalek: :ende neu: :GOOtube: :place: :artery: :sewer: :fnq: :mole: :hols: :vote: :lumberjack: :prune: :plant: :opinion: :audit: :dig it: :neck: :life is a minestrone: :pastie: :fortysix: :away: :fully-sik: :play: :BoB2006: :cOMMunity: :pops: :bagge: :break: :pwnage: :n00b: :service with a snarl: :open: :NOT(advance): :nectarine: :sushi: :who?: :reception: :another day, another...?: :The WALL (reprise): :the WALL [part 2]: :the WALL [part 1]: :>insert seasons greetings here<: :surf: :Owe-Pee: :catAtonic: :over: :cUt: :airCON: :ooRoo: :building: :tick: :you raise me up: :duct: :yogified: :food glorious food: :diurnal anomoly: :operatunity: :wPod: :myPod [pod=foot, ok]: :is this the real life?: :bitter and twisted: :shiny: :Ahh, Serenity: :computer says no: :smef: :Go Maroon!: :best laid plans of mice: :Ready to Rok: :gravity 1, wonko 0: :Kairos 2: :fluv@x: :cluss prags: :LAN: :Axes of Evil: :Little Slices of Death: :Wrapped in plastic..: :A Horse is a horse, of course: :ego is not a dirty word: :Fun & Run: :Hedging and Edging: :Testiculation: :weak end: :I before E except after C: :Reality - hah!: :fluezy: :Too darned hot!: :Eye of the Storm?: :The Carnivale is Over: :Calm b4 the storm: :Asylum: :A Quest: :High Tea and "Back to Asylum Shopping": :hi ho, hi ho, it: :Working in a coal mine...: :Here I stand, foot in hand, talking to my wall...: :Another day ... another day, really: :We're here because we can: