Uncomfortably Numb
.: what a nerve :.
« Sun 04 May 2008 01:04:34 PM »
O.K. Just a little pinprick.

Reality on returning to the asylum after 7 weeks away is ... interesting. Parents, quite rightly, wanting to know how their little treasures went in the preceding term and me with little information about that is also interesting - hope they got something out of the P-T interviews, will see. The asylum seems to be moving in slow motion at the moment, unsure why - one can only do what one can do.

Spent some time at Maroon with another bunch of Kairossers - lovely chaps one and all. Again I marvel at the opportunity for young adults to take time out to reflect on life, the universe and everything and thank the asylum for providing the opportunity.

There will be no more aaaaaaaaah! But you may feel a little sick.

Tasmania is a wonderland, taswegians lovely [but I doubt I could eat a whole one], would happily do it all again [even the 2.8k km we drove in our all purpose blue zippy car]. Paddled in a sea kayak in open ocean, waves breaking over the wife [lol, sorry, a benefit of being the stern paddler?], being scared near death in an open boat in the western ocean in mountanous seas off Bruny Island [I have discovered that if I am actually scared for my life, I do not get seasick], walking amongst towering termperate forests, digging car out of snow drifts, sampling local delicacies, all very hard to take - not.

If anyone is wondering if they should do long service leave, I would emphatically say yes, but do not waste it - the wife and I waited until we could go without the kids [sounds selfish, but we decided to be there for them all thru school] so we could have some "us" time again - was a good plan. Life conspires to throw curve balls and little in a real life is truly care-free, but the time away was precious.

Can you stand up? I do believe its working, good.

So on christmas eve past I awoke with searing pain down my right arm and a _very_ stiff neck and shoulders. I was convinced I was having a heart attack. This is in itself was scary, but as the symptoms stabilised, I realised they were muscular and lamented the fact that nothing was going to be open for a few days. Dosed to the eyeballs with analgesics and muscle relaxants, 4 days later I was taken to physio and after considerable manipulation over a number of sessions, by the end of the holidays I was at least partially mobile if not free from pain.

Nerves pinched in my neck were recruiting muscles across the shoulders and back, and cramping arm and hand on my right side [still are actually, more than 4 months later]. Visits to specialists, enough xrays to cause me to glow faintly in the dark and a series of CT scans later the problem is diagnosed.

I have 2 buggered disks in my neck: C5/6 is compressed and cracked, slowly but painfully paralysing my right hand, finger at a time - currently thumb, pointer finger and now the middle finger is fuzzing out [making writing and typing an adventure, amongst other things]; C6/7 has herniated and is pressing on the nerve root that feeds my right arm, causing unpredictable but constant sheets of pain, muscle cramps along with burning and tingling in most positons. The solution is surgury: removal of both disks, fusing of the vertebrae [metal plate and bone graft from my hip, apparently]. The treatment path is sooner rather than wait as the nerves are learning to stay ON, which could mean that when they no longer have anything to winge about, they will anyways because that is what they have learned.

Alarmed is close to how I feel about this, but my ability to withstand the discomfort has come to an end; pain management is the only non-surgical option and, although I do not like the drugs, the drugs like me. Time off in hospital, some of it unconscious, to awaken with a voice box through which a surgeon has been up to his elbows is not a prospect that is helping me sleep right now. Still, it has to be done, priority wonko for once.

Let the weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth begin. Contingency plans and disruption minimization are work of the moment. At least they will be screwing my head on tightly now, so there is little chance I will lose it again, and promise to provide hours of entertainment for metal detectorists at airports which is always a nice change from those wielding rubber gloves.

That will keep you going through the show. Come on its time to go.

Comfortably numb - a dream or nightmare, difficult to say, in the eyes of the beholder I suppose. Still, an inspirational lyric from "The Wall" by Pink Floyd sums up the human condition for me at the moment.

Say "Hi" to your mum for me and say sorry - normal transmission will be resumed just as soon as we can determine what normal is.
Feeling:: apprehensive
Watching:: "Doc Martin" on good old Aunty [charming cornish humour]
Reading:: "Shogun" [yes, I know, still]
Hearing:: "Third" by Portishead [deliciously discordant, the fans will hate it, care factor?]
Accessed:: 1873 times so far, not that anyone is counting.


nervert (adj.) A nervy computer nerd whose wavering skills are dedicated to stealtily surfing for obscure anime or pornographic materials whilst pretending to research his religion essay.
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